


Incident Reports (That's Not How May Queen Works Remix)

by megyal



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Auror Harry Potter, Lust Potion/Spell, M/M, Potions Master Draco Malfoy, background Ron/Pansy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-07 06:51:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14665617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/megyal/pseuds/megyal
Summary: Only you, mate,Ron says, anddoused with May Queen, honestly,andcan't wait for this report.





	Incident Reports (That's Not How May Queen Works Remix)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [curiouslyfic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/curiouslyfic/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Sex Ed for Aurors](https://archiveofourown.org/works/95239) by [curiouslyfic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/curiouslyfic/pseuds/curiouslyfic). 



> The summary is a line from the source fic, and it was really what kicked off my remix. Dear Curiouslyfic, I'm sorry I didn't focus on _Childhood Chews_. My only excuse is that I really like _Sex Ed for Aurors_ and I hope you like the remix of it.

_**MINISTRY OF LAW ENFORCEMENT INCIDENT/ACCIDENT REPORT** _

**_REPORT DATE:_ ** _September 17, 2011_

_**LOCATION/BUILDING:** Ministry of Law Enforcement Forensics Laboratory 05_

_**DATE/TIME OCCURRED:** September 16, 2011, 15:45_

_**TITLE/ROLE:** Durward Benjamiun Cullen, Potioneer Level 3_

_**SUPERVISOR:** Draco Malfoy, Forensics Laboratory Potions Master_

_**INCIDENT DESCRIPTION:** _

**__** _Sample 481 of Aphrodisio Et Imperioxir 009 (street name: “May Queen”) had just been removed from the Sirporeo charm and was being transported from Lab 05 to Side-Room 16 when I stumbled and most of Sample 481 spilled over Auror Potter’s left arm. Reactions were immediate and intense; Auror Potter immediately fixated on my supervisor, Potions Master Malfoy, with other typical manifestations of aphrodisio’s swift potency: increased respiration and dilated pupils. Effects of imperioxir were also present, in that Auror Potter was compelled to act out on the effects of aphrodisio as soon as this particular component altered his neurochemistry. It is noted that Auror Potter did not appear to have the nearly uncontrollable response of other victims who have been drugged with Aphrodisio Et Imperioxir 009, although he had received a little over a typical dose._

_I know I should have checked the cork to see that it had been properly affixed, and that I should have made sure that the Statera charm had been level all over the vial’s surface. I really didn’t think that anything would happen in the five metres between Lab 05 and Side-Room 16. I in no way possible tipped that potion on purpose. First off all, that’s Harry Potter. Second of all…that’s Harry Potter._

_Please don’t sack me, I need this job. The health insurance is really solid. Potions Master Malfoy might cut a poor person into strips using words you’re not sure of, but he knows his stuff and I do like learning from him._

_Also, please don’t tell my mum._

+

This was probably the worst day in the past five years; it was sobering that Draco could divide his life into five year Blocks, point at quite a few moments in each and say, “This lot was fucked.” The end of Block Three and most of Block Four had been pretty horrifying all the way through. In Block Five he’d struggled past nasty smiles, pinched lips and some self-righteous attempts at cursing, but he’d managed to avoid them all and finish his _Scientiæ magiste_ in Progressive Potions. Then, instead of setting up an exclusive boutique for a select class of wizards, like his father had suggested, Draco had sent in an application to the Ministry of Law Enforcement.

He didn’t hear from them for four whole months, in which time his father’s letters from prison gave off a very snarky air of _I-told-you-so_. His mother calmly burned those letters and said, “It will be fine, dear.”

Within two more days, it was fine. Ronald Weasley sent him a note requesting his presence at the MLE for an interview, and Weasley sat in with him as he was interviewed (re: interrogated) by a group of dusty Potions Masters and ragged Aurors trying to trip him up on his answers.

It was a relief having Weasley’s large and muscular frame sitting beside him as he answered questions and displayed his speed and accuracy at potions work; absolutely unnecessary of course, but it felt really comforting to have him there. Pansy had said that the thing she’d liked first about Ron was his overall bulk, how well-built he was in comparison to other men in their age-group. Everyone had been stunned with Pans started dating Weasley, and then _marrying him_ (the atmosphere of the bonding ceremony had been one of stunned disbelief) but Weasley and Pans really loved each other. The shockwaves from that particular marriage had apparently desensitised the rest of the Magical population, enough that on his first day of work he walked into the MLE’s Forensics and there was barely a blink from anyone.

Not that they would be able to blink at him offensively. He had been ranked at Potioneer Level 8, and at Level 10, he would be reviewed for MLE Potions Master status, if there was an opening: to manage the laboratories with a tiny fleet of subordinates, work in close communication with field- and office-based Aurors, and even present professional positions in cases brought forward to the Wizengamot. He could do so much good.

 _They won’t allow you_ , one missive from his father noted; it was not a malicious tone; just morose. _Not after what we…what I’ve done_.

“Then do your best, my son,” Narcissa advised. “Be just who you are, work as hard as you ever did, and whatever happens, happens. As long as we work, stay legal, our assets will not be touched.”

Draco followed his mother’s advice; within fourteen months, with recommendations from Acting Department Head Auror Weasley and the retiring Division Head of the Forensics Laboratories, he was appointed as the MLE Potions Master of Labs 05, 07 and 09…not the most advanced laboratories, but reasonably stocked and furnished. He was a Ministry Potions Master now. He had minions. He could handle this.

He could handle _anything_.

Right, not _everything_. He couldn’t handle Harry Potter, but to be honest, Draco wasn’t sure there was a body out there that could. Harry Potter, to everyone’s surprise, didn’t end up as a Field Auror. No; it was Dark Artefacts for the Hero. When Draco had found out, he’d been caught between shock and a very interesting sensation of rightness.

“He’s been messing about with dark artefacts for his whole life,” Pansy pointed out one brunch during coffee and cognac, when Draco had explained his frame of mind to her. “Wasn’t he literally a dark artefact himself?”

“God, Pans,” Draco had groaned, sighing and rolling his eyes. She was ridiculous at times, honestly.

Dark Artefacts Aurors never usually got mixed up with Forensics Labs, unless it was like that case with the poison that had been activated by a charmed flask; that had been kind of fun, because Potter was so amusing even when he was being intense. He had a habit of breaking a serious mood with an absolutely horrifying joke, Draco had _no idea_ he was so sharply morbid. When Draco explained how the spelled silver of the flask helped to activate the transmuted arsenic sulfide in the poison, most of the other Aurors had seemed on the brink of falling asleep, except Potter, who stared at him with those sharp eyes and nodded in all the right places.

When the debrief session ended and all the other Aurors had fairly stampeded out of the lab, Draco said, “Just now you seemed like a properly attentive Potions student.” His awkward attempt at teasing emerged coldly, from between stiff lips. Potter had glanced at him, one dark eyebrow raised as he offered a quick grin.

“I was always a properly attentive student, Malfoy,” he answered, mock-severe. “You didn’t notice because you were busy being brilliant and a berk.”

“Well,” Draco had managed because… _well_. In any case, Dark Artefacts rarely had reason to hang about Forensics Labs, but Potter dropped in fairly regularly; sometimes it was to ask questions that Draco, to his shame and pride, could answer because he grew up Malfoy and he probably had a dark artefact as a teething ring. 

At other times it was to bounce thoughts off Draco (and by bounce, this meant that Potter would sit on the floor in the corner of Draco’s small office, robes flung across the back of the tiny sofa that he _should_ have been using, legs clad in dark jeans stretched across the faux timber flooring; he asked Draco questions that he would answer himself three seconds later, arrive at some conclusion and then leave Draco with a cheery, “Thanks for your help!”), and really, it was wonderful for Draco’s image and pride. His assistant Singh, the Chief Administrator of Sense in the labs, would give Draco a very long stare as soon as Potter strode out of his office. Draco hoped his own face portrayed that he had no idea what she was talking about, never mind that she hadn’t said a single word.

In any case, worst day of Draco’s sixth Five Year Block? This one. Bloody Benjie ‘Please-Don’t-Call-Me-Durward’ Cullen had been traipsing past Draco’s workstation, a full vial of some berry-pale liquid in one gloved hand. Draco had been discussing with Potter and Weasley about magically suspended doses of poisons which had been hidden in objects such as bracelets or amulets, spelled to release the potion against the victims’ skin; such a use of an object classified it as a Dark Artefact, and Draco had been having a quick session when Cullen stumbled over his own damned feet and the vial turned over on Potter.

For a long beat, there had been no reaction at all. Weasley had kept talking, but Potter, who had been frowning at him, went perfectly still all over. Potter turned his head, and his green gaze landed solidly on Draco.

A warm wave slid up Draco’s back, even as he’d been answering Weasley’s query. Draco caught the horrified expression on Cullen’s face, then he saw the patch of thick substance seeping into the brown skin of Potter’s left arm; the soft smell of thyme blossomed in the air. The wide sleeves of his robes had been rolled up and because this was Draco’s life, of _course_ the Hero of the Wizarding World would be doused with an exceedingly robust lust potion in his lab, on his watch.

“For fuck’s sake,” he snapped, cursing for probably the first time since he’s worked here because he _just cannot believe this_. “Cullen, you’ve spilt it on Potter, you are so unbelievably _sacked_.”

He looked at Potter, who stared at him as if he was a predator and Draco was prey that had just executed a very interesting maneuver. Potter tilted his head, and took one step towards him. Draco resisted the urge to scramble back, because he could feel the magnitude of Potter’s magical strength, all bent in his direction. His own gaze skittered across Potter’s totality, taking in the details over which he spent so much time musing.

Potter was rather slender, with long legs that made him seem much taller than he actually was; he liked wearing pointy boots but even with them on he was still a few centimeters shorter than Draco. He possessed big hands and long fingers that in no way related to the rest of his body. Full lips, and a mole just over the right side of his mouth. The eyes were dark bottle-green, but they seemed overly large for his slender face, slanted upwards at the outer edges. Someone had been at his head recently with scissors, a comb and some product, because his hair had shifted from a style created by an infuriated blackbird to something with a bit more undercut and some nicely defined curls on top, some of them drooping over his forehead to conceal the scar.

All of this Draco noted in time gone slow. Potter took another step toward him and he _smiled_. Draco’s stomach clenched in response, because Potter gave him quick grins, or sly twists of his mouth, or sometimes loud guffaws but _never_ a smile like this. This smile was full of promise and want.

That smile was _aphrodisio_ hunting through his system and dismantling every single constraint, replacing it with lust for the first person he saw. That smile was _imperioxir_ crashing right after, holding the doors open and fulfilling a double role: one, urging Potter to follow through on _aphrodisio_ ‘s sensual demands and two, making sure that whomever the focus was, they could get whatever they wanted. All they had to do was ask.

Draco was not about to be that focus. Not like this, no matter how much a very large part of him thought that was a fantastic idea. Draco hit him with a _petrificus totalus_ and Potter’s whole body went as stiff as a board. Like an old tree falling in the night, he toppled over onto Weasley. Draco hoped that the dismay he felt was sufficiently masked, for Auror Potter’s reflexes were better than that; he would have never allowed a full-body bind to snag him so easily.

“What the _fuck_ , Malfoy,” Weasley grunted, easily setting Potter to his feet. He didn’t reach around to his wand-holster, which was something Draco deeply appreciated, but he was obviously quite confused.

“He’s got May Queen on him, Weasley,” Draco explained in a rush of breath. He spun to bellow, “Singh! Get over here, _now_!”

+

_**MINISTRY OF LAW ENFORCEMENT INCIDENT/ACCIDENT REPORT** _

**_REPORT DATE:_ ** _September 30, 2011_

_**LOCATION/BUILDING:** MLE Forensics Lab 5_

_**DATE/TIME OCCURRED:** September 16, 2011, 15:40_

_**TITLE/ROLE:** Ronald B. Weasley, Department Head, Auror Division_

_**SUPERVISOR:** Nahendra Roya, MLE Chief of Staff_

_**INCIDENT DESCRIPTION:** _

**__** _Auror Harry Potter and I were in an informal meeting with Division Head Malfoy when one of the lab technicians, Durward Cullen, spilled some May Queen on Auror Potter. I was informed by Division Head Malfoy that this particular sample was different in some way, but that it would wear off in a an hour or so._

_It did not wear off in an hour or so. Frankly, if it wasn’t Malfoy I wouldn’t be this sure that that potion has left Auror Potter’s system. But I take Malfoy at his word._

_After being doused by May Queen Auror Potter went after Division Head Malfoy a number of times. He was placed in a full-body bind, strapped down and also Stunned to protect himself and Malfoy and prevent any other occurrence. Auror Potter broke out of his restraints on nearly every single occasion and frankly, I should have known better._

_The May Queen wore off some time in the late evening and Auror Potter appeared to have natural responses to my queries. He also did not approach Division Head Malfoy for at least a week after._

_Please see attached a completed EMPLOYEE SOCIAL/ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP DISCLOSURE FORM. Magical signatures are confirmed, with no indication of undue coercion._

+

Draco should have expected that Potter would have broken out of the Full-Body Bind. Really, the man had gone up against an entire Dark Lord and _won_ , so a _petrificus totalus_ must have been a breeze to snap. He had been yelling at his techs, and Singh had been yelling back at him because she was just as panicked; everyone was racing back and forth as if they were in the middle of a Howler-storm. Vials were shuffled with rapid-fire spells, samples drawn and compared until the the tainted batch was located. Everyone fell into a frenzy of re-labelling. Who the _fuck_ had thought to add Mackled Malaclaw to a lust potion?! That was akin to adding dragonflower powder to a bonfire.

He had been frowning down at a glowing readout from the malaclaw sample, shifting away the unnecessary data with irritated flicks of his fingers, when he was embraced from behind. The arms that curled around his waist were thin and brown, fingers pressed tenderly against Draco’s stomach. He smelled Potter’s cologne and felt the press of warm lips against his neck. Draco yelped and flinched rather sharply; he winced as the back of his head connected with Potter’s nose. He spun around in the circle of Potter’s arms, meaning to talk him down but then he was being kissed. It was the most horrible kiss, mostly because Draco’s mouth had fallen wide open. Potter’s lips moved against his, tongue slipping into Draco’s mouth. His body was pressed up against Draco’s, lean and strong and yet _yielding_. Draco shook with the effort to not return the kiss.

He shoved Potter away, hoping that his trembling was imperceptible. Something in his chest clenched at the confused expression on Potter’s face before it was swamped by that heady wave of want. 

Potter’s gaze roamed over his entirety like an archive spell recording available ingredients. Those dark brows furrowed together when he focused on Draco’s fingers. Then he stared at Draco’s face, his consideration softening from intoxicating concern to inebriating sweetness.

“It’s all right, I’m here, just let me,” Potter murmured, his voice soft as if he was was trying to soothe a frightened Crup. He moved fast; one minute he was a few steps away, then he was right up in Draco’s face again, kissing away his extremely feeble protests. The kiss this time was even more tender. If he kissed Potter back the way he wanted to, then it would be disastrous. Potter wasn’t in his right mind at all; when the May Queen wore off, he would either be horrified at himself, apologetic to Draco or, even worse, not lounge about uselessly in Draco’s presence. He thought about that last bit very hard when he hit Potter with another full-body bind.

+

_**MINISTRY OF LAW ENFORCEMENT INCIDENT/ACCIDENT REPORT** _

**_REPORT DATE:_ ** _September 18, 2011_

_**LOCATION/BUILDING:** Ministry of Law Enforcement Forensics Laboratory 05_

_**DATE/TIME OCCURRED:** September 16, 2011, 15:45_

_**TITLE/ROLE:** Draco Malfoy, Forensics Laboratory Potions Master_

_**SUPERVISOR:** Nahendra Roya, MLE Chief of Staff_

_**INCIDENT DESCRIPTION:** _

**__** _Durward Benjamiun Cullen, Potioneer Level 3, spilled nearly an entire vial of Sample 481 of Aphrodisio Et Imperioxir 009 onto Auror Harry Potter’s left arm. Auror Potter suffered no physical injuries from contact with the potion. Aerem was immediately cast by Assistant Laboratory Manager Singh to prevent stray droplets from being spread to other personnel. After checks, it was established that no other person had been affected by Sample 481 and Auror Potter was placed under quarantine as per laboratory and Ministry health and safety procedures._

_Despite the lack of physical harm, Auror Potter’s general demeanour was altered by Sample 481 of Aphrodisio Et Imperioxir 009 as evidenced by his amorous advances to my person. Auror Potter was put under Petrificus Totalus three times, strapped down one of those times as a secondary measure, and then Stunned during another occasion. This particular behaviour can be partly attributed to Auror Potter’s sheer magical capability and determination. In addition, Sample 481 had a noteworthy ingredient replacement: three-fourths of the usual quantity of the frozen Ashwinder eggs had been replaced with a matching amount of Mackled Malaclaw (tails, claws and head portions)._

_In its usual form, Aphrodisio Et Imperioxir 009 is a lust potion of great potency and speed of action. The free will of victims is diminished drastically through Imperioxir, diminishing the inhibitions of victims; Aphrodisio enforces a sexual fixation on the first person they see, usually the perpetrator. These components enhance each other in an efficient manner._

_The Mackled Malaclaw may introduce an effect on which I can only theorise at this point: it shifts the victim’s control on quantum reality, in the same way as Felix Felicis. Please note that this is only a theory, and a very questionable one at that. Further research is required by the Forensics Laboratories in conjunction with the Department of Mysteries._

_Trace charms have been placed on the Mackled Malaclaw of Sample 481, and the location of their purchase has been narrowed down to two locations in Margin Alley. This information has been submitted to the Special Team in charge of May Queen Investigations._

_I must state that Auror Potter did not hurt me in any way. Auror Potter demonstrated his ability to dispel the effects of compulsion attacks, even in the form of a potion; as of the writing of this report, Auror Potter has not displayed any further behaviour modifications. He has also not exhibited other after-effects such as: anterograde amnesia or general confusion, automatism, sluggishness, clumsiness, or weakened magical capacity._

+

Potter broke out of being Petrified _twice_. If Draco hadn’t known him since they were eleven, and hadn’t personally witnessed his stupid habit of being heroic multiple times, he would have given Potter an extremely wide berth for the rest of their natural lives. Draco couldn’t concentrate on figuring out how long Potter would be affected, because either Potter would be attached to him like bowtruckle to its favourite tree, or he would be _thinking_ about Potter: Potter’s hands on his hips, Potter’s intensity when he looked at Draco, the marks Potter had left on the pale skin of his neck. Draco had spent a few minutes in the restroom, leaning forward to inspect the blooms of purple-red. Slowly, he ran the tip of his wand over the marks and watched with some regret as the marks faded.

They were still there, though, as he continued to test droplets of Sample 481, careful to not let any of the potion touch his skin. Draco had only concealed them, although Singh narrowed her dark eyes when she glanced at his neck. He could still feel them when he left the main lab and went back into his office. Weasley sat scowling at a restrained Potter, who scowled right back. As soon as he saw Draco, however, Potter’s whole being lit up and tensed, straining towards him. Draco licked his lips, and attempted a small smile; Potter must be going through hell right now. It was probably horrid for him to feel this way: out of control, wanting someone he didn’t think of in such a manner. A smile wouldn’t hurt.

Potter’s frame relaxed from its rigid state at the sight of Draco’s smile and Draco tried hard not to let the his whole face go weird with sweet joy.

“Well done, Potter,” he said, trying for a very even tone. “You’ve stayed put this time.”

Despite the full body-bind, Draco read the patent satisfaction radiating out of Potter; he was _so_ _pleased_ at Draco’s slight commendation, so willing to make Draco happy in any way possible, and Draco told himself, _watch it. This is so very heady, and so very not for you_.

Weasley, still in a sour mood because Potter had escaped from under his watch twice, asked, “Done figured out when it’ll wear off as yet?”

Draco shook his head. He considered the bound and silent Hero and thought, _This is Potter. Imperioxir doesn’t have to wear off, not for him_. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Weasley,” he murmured, feeling his way through the words carefully, “but I need to talk to him alone.”

“Are you _sure_?” Weasley looked as if he’d rather face a Basilisk than leave them by themselves. Draco nodded, and Weasley’s shoulders shifted in a tectonic shrug. He ambled out, a large man who moved like he was half his size, and closed the door.

Potter’s face was full of hunger as Draco watched him. _Come on, Potter_ , he urged silently, dismayed as Potter seemed to sink into himself, still with those wide eyes fixed on Draco’s face. _Why aren’t you throwing off the Imperioxir?_

He crouched down beside Potter’s chair and touched his hand. Potter blinked; he returned from wherever he had gone in his head, gaze loving as it was directed to Draco. It was too much to bear.

Draco said, “Potter, please focus on what I’m going to say. Listen, really _listen_ , and not just because you like the sound of my voice, or whatever. Hear the words, all right? There’s a component in the May Queen that’s distilled compulsion, and if it was anyone but you, I’d be more worried than I am now. But you’ve fought things like this before, and if you try, you’ll get out from under this too.”

The green stare was as timeless as an ancient forest. Draco let out a slow breath and asked, “Did you understand what I just said, Potter?”

Potter regarded him, and then his countenance altered slowly. It was like watching someone struggle to wake up. The Petrificus Totalus couldn’t obscure the frustrated request in his eyes.

“Yes, I know,” Draco acknowledged, eying him. “Let’s give it a try. I’ll take off the body-bind and I will ask you _not to move,_ not even a muscle, Potter. Just as you are, all right?” He removed the spell, and stood up, taking one large step away from Potter, who twitched. Draco had his wand in hand, was ready to cast the body-bind, but Potter didn’t move again.

“What is this?” he murmured, staring up into Draco’s face…still hungry, but in some form of control. 

“May Queen,” Draco told him. “There’s a part of it that’s like liquid _Imperio_. Muggle Appreciation Day gone wild, you might say.”

Potter blinked again, and swayed. “What…liquid Imperio? That’s a thing?”

“It is now,” Draco said, relaxing against the wall. He was exhausted; he felt as if he’d been hanging by his arms all day. “Since a few silly magic folk found out how Muggles like spending Beltane, and they figured that a lust potion of this type was the way to go. We’ve been after this for _years_ , obviously you haven’t been reading the divisional reports.”

Potter shrugged, his gaze dropping to the gleaming tile floor; his heavy attention fell away from Draco in the first time for hours. Draco recognized disappointment curdling in himself, and squashed it without mercy. “I’m in Dark Artefacts, Malfoy,” Potter said. “I’m really not required to be all read up on illegal potions rings.” He raised one hand to adjust his glasses and Draco tensed.

“Potter. I meant what I said. I asked you not to move.”

He received a withering look for all his worry. “Yeah, well, my glasses aren’t meant to be worn at the tip of my nose,” Potter told him pointedly and then his eyebrows raised. “Oh. I see. You told me not to move, and…I’m moving. Well, isn’t that the whole point? And I know what you _said_ , but I’m sure you meant don’t move _towards_ you, right?”

“There’s our brilliant Hero,” Draco said, dry to hide the cascade of relief and, oddly, loss. “I’m sure that you’re still under the influence, but I think this is working. But I still don’t know how long this particular sample of May Queen will affect you, Potter, I really don’t--”

It was unfortunate that Draco kept forgetting how bloody _fast_ Potter was, because one moment he was seated peaceably and the next he was backing Draco into the bookshelves, all restless limbs and roaming lips. Draco gasped as Potter’s hand stroked down his neck, canceling the concealment charm with an arousing brush of magic. Draco heard himself moan and then gave up. He couldn’t hold himself back anymore.

So he kissed Potter back, gasping as Potter nipped at his lower lip and grabbed his wrists, pinning his arms over his head. A few books toppled over, but every part of Draco was directed right at Potter, especially his cock. Potter was hard too, rolling against him over and over.

Potter broke away to press their foreheads together, their breaths mingling with every harsh pant.

“Potter, this is the May Queen--” Draco tried and choked because Potter released his wrists, and stroked down his arms. “Potter--”

“Shut up,” Potter told him, almost conversationally. Draco closed his eyes.

“Potter, you don’t want this,” Draco said. “You really don’t.”

“I said _shush_ ,” Potter hissed, and his hand was inside Draco’s trousers, stroking him. Draco released a shaky moan, and thrust in Potter’s hand. He was going to get off on someone who had no control over themselves at the moment. He was going to get off on _Potter,_ which, admittedly, was something he really wanted and needed, but…not like this.

“I’m so sorry,” he murmured against Potter’s cheek. “I tried, honestly.”

Potter’s mouth was on his, hard and wet and full of something that Draco didn’t hope to read. Then, Potter was out of his arms, staring at him with hard clarity.

“Enjoy your blue balls,” he said, and walked out of Draco’s office.

+

_**MINISTRY OF LAW ENFORCEMENT INCIDENT/ACCIDENT REPORT** _

**_REPORT DATE:_ ** _September 20, 2011_

_**LOCATION/BUILDING:** MLE Forensics Laboratory 5_

_**DATE/TIME OCCURRED:** September 16, 2011, 15:40_

_**TITLE/ROLE:** Harry Potter, Dark Artefacts, Auror Division_

_**SUPERVISOR:** R. Weasley, Head Auror_

_**INCIDENT DESCRIPTION:** _

_One of the technicians in the Forensics Lab spilled some May Queen on my arm. I was quarantined under the watch of my direct supervisor and Potions Master Malfoy. I recall being restrained and stunned because I kept going after Malfoy. I also recall Malfoy assisting me in working through the Imperio-based part of May Queen. The lust component wore off in three days. Self-check charms show no continued intoxication. I also underwent an external check and a copy of the results are attached._

+

Draco did _not_ enjoy his blue balls.

He kept away from Potter; he spent the next however-many days trapped in his lab, creating nearly one hundred versions of May Queen: without the maclaw, with more tincture of thyme, with a pinch more of squill bulb and so on and so forth. He noted the interaction of the different ingredients, their shades and bubble formation, and recorded them in tight handwriting. He still couldn’t figure out what the maclaw had been added for, but all this work was unnecessary. He was simply undertaking his precise version of busywork, to prevent himself from storming to Potter and demanding all sorts of things, driven by anger, amazement and want.

Potter had defeated Imperioxir, but he would have to still deal with Aphrodisio for some time afterwards. Draco held himself back, refusing to let Pansy harangue him into doing _something, anything!_

“Hello,” Potter said at his door on the fifth day. Draco put down his quill and closed his book before looking up at Potter, who stared back with a serenely blank expression. 

“Hello,” Draco answered, and frowned when Potter waved a small cylinder of rolled-up parchment “What--”

“I’ve written up my incident report,” Potter told him. “Have you?”

Draco had, of course. He was not about to tell Potter this, and simply raised one eyebrow in a non-answer.

“Well, make sure you don’t get your traces mixed up with mine,” Potter said, mildly, and Draco counted to ten. Even the greenest rookie knew how to file reports so that signature traces didn’t interfere with others in the same incident batch. Personnel Archives and Administrivia Division took their jobs _very_ seriously.

“Potter--”

“We need to talk,” Potter cut in and Draco stood up, leaning forward with what felt like a ghastly smile.

“Talk,” he muttered. “We can’t _talk_ , Potter, not when you might still be under Aphrodisio--”

“I’m not,” Potter said, and he needed to stop doing that. “It’s in my report. It’s completely out of my system.”

Before he was able to stop himself, Draco asked, “Then why are you here?”

Potter just regarded him for a long beat. His gaze felt as if he’d been watching Draco for months, years, and he would keep looking for as long as he would be allowed.

“Aren’t you supposed to be the genius?” Potter asked, softly mocking. “Why _wouldn’t_ I be here?”

“You just happened to look at me when you got dosed, Potter.” Draco clenched his fingers. “That’s how May Queen works.”

Potter tilted his head to one side and narrowed his eyes, concentrating very hard on something. “No…that’s not right. I was looking at Ron, not you.”

 _What an odd bit of luck_ , Draco thought and then the part of his brain that was _supposed_ to have been quite competent at Potions woke up for the first time in days; it linked notions so hard that Draco felt sparks behind his eyes. That Mackled Maclaw made the botched batch of May Queen into a sort of infernal _Felix Felicis_. It altered probability levels within Potter himself.

…and Potter went after what he wanted.

Draco held out his hand, and Potter took it.

**Author's Note:**

> [Fic headers](http://hd-remix.tumblr.com/post/174303152589/drarry-fic-incident-reports-thats-not-how-may) and a [pull quote](http://hd-remix.tumblr.com/post/174308831036/potter-took-another-step-toward-him-and-he-smiled) have been posted to tumblr. Help promote the fest by liking and reblogging!


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